


Hollow

by tenmillionotters



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Gen, Parent-Child Relationship, TG Jack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-13
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-08-30 21:15:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8549365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tenmillionotters/pseuds/tenmillionotters
Summary: He looked up at him and had trouble reading him, despite his superior being hot headed and he did have a very bad temper, never hiding his anger at all, it did feel like all this was an act. Deep inside he was someone different, Arima stared on his feet again.Yes, deep down inside they all were someone else.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is... just like a very long ... headcanon. I can't really explain this, sorry.

“... what did you think you’re doing -” 

Arima lowered his gaze and stared on the ground, he felt Taishi’s piercing glare, it wasn’t directed at him, it lingered on the man who was standing right before him. 

“I told you it’s dangerous you can’t just make decisions like that on your own-” Marude turned his head to the other teenager and then back to Arima. “Listen. Tell your friend to go home you’re coming with me.” 

The boy smiled at his friend and nodded lightly as if he was saying, I’ll be okay don’t worry about me. But what would happen next? Would he tell his father about this…? Not that he knew that Tsuneyoshi Washuu was his father… but who would be in the most trouble? He himself or Marude who was in charge of him? 

He looked up at him and had trouble reading him, despite his superior being hot headed and he did have a very bad temper, never hiding his anger at all, it did feel like all this was an act. Deep inside he was someone different, Arima stared on his feet again.Yes, deep down inside they all were someone else. 

“M-Marude-san, this isn’t the way to the CCG -” 

“I know.” He stopped and turned to Arima. “I didn’t say we’re going there.” Instead he lead him to small stall, a little restaurant. Why did the boy look so stunned? “Have you never eaten street food?” 

“E-Eh… I…” Oh God, he really couldn’t explain this, Taishi had tried to urge him to go to one of these restaurants with him but he felt awkward doing so. 

“No need to be embarrassed, come here, take a seat.” 

Marude went ahead, sat down and greeted the owner, they started chatting, Arima felt a little dizzy and pressed his bag into his chest, his heart was beating rapidly as he sat down next to his superior. 

“Oh! Who is that? I didn’t know your sister had a son -” 

“No, no.” He shook his head lightly. “He’s not my nephew.” 

Now his stomach was rambling, what would he say? Why did it make Arima so nervous? Of course Marude wasn’t stupid, he wouldn’t tell the man the truth about his undercover mission from the CCG. 

“He’s my foster son.” 

How would he say this so easily? Arima stared down on the counter and felt his chest tighten. Son? … did he really see him like that or…? 

“A shy one, just like you.” The man behind the counter laughed. “I remember how you used to come here with your father when you were even younger than him… and now you’re all grown up and take care of a child yourself.” 

“Hey don’t be so melodramatic -” 

The men kept on bickering while Arima chose his meal, he couldn’t go for anything big… he had spend most money for snacks at school. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll pay.” 

His eyes widened as he looked at Marude. “R-Really?” Was it that obvious that he was troubled by things like that? 

He nodded lightly and smiled. “Did you think I was going to scold you?” 

Now that was embarrassing but he wouldn’t lie. “... yes…” What should he expect? He got injured again, how was he supposed to explain it to his father if he’d ask…? But it wasn’t like he even cared. Maybe his half brother…? He was kind, but they weren’t close. Not at all. There was some falseness in his kindness, but lately there was a shift, something genuine reflected in his eyes and smile. How odd… 

“No no… don’t worry. Do you know what you want to eat yet?” 

Actually he was reading the card this whole time but he had no idea. “... what do you like best?” It seemed like that reply had stunned his boss and he was taken aback for a moment before he ordered ‘the usual’ for both of them. “Do you come here often?”

“He eats here almost every day. So I’m surprised I never heard of you.” 

Marude sighed and took a sip of his drink. “You did. That’s Arima.” 

So they did talk about him? What did Marude say? Of course he had to hold back, be somewhat … secretive? Then what was left? There wasn’t much to say about him, he was nothing special. He was… a nobody. 

“Oh!” The man started laughing. “Sometimes I’m blind to the obvious. He always talks about you, he’s very proud of you, you know?” His smile grew wider, but his eyes told a different story, he drifted off into nostalgia, was somewhere else with his mind. “... a lot like his own father used to talk about him…” Then he snapped out of it, made a joke and went back to work. Did something happen to Marude’s father…? 

“He was a construction worker. Nothing fancy.” There was this sadness his eyes. “He died in an accident. I was just a teenager back then… it was the day when I got the letter with the notice that I’m accepted at the academy…” In a way his father died the day his old life died with him. 

Arima swallowed hard. Did it hurt… to lose a parent? He couldn’t really imagine it and that thought stunned him. “... I’m sorry…” 

He laughed and patted Arima’s head, much to the surprise of the boy. “Don’t be. It happened years ago and I am grateful for the time I got to spend with him. I miss him… I think I always will, but I had to move on. I don’t think he’d want me to keep on holding onto these feelings…” 

It was odd to hear Marude talk so freely about his feelings, to see him so relaxed. Arima didn’t know what to say, so he quietly waited for his food, but even when it was served he had a hard time touching it, there was something that still lingered on his mind. “Marude-san… are you going to tell the director what I did?” 

If he wasn’t so nervous he might have laughed, Marude looked too funny with puffed cheeks, in the process of chewing his food quickly so he could respond. He swallowed hard and shook his head. “God no. He doesn’t have to know everything.” 

Itsuki stared down at the bowl and sighed, of course he knew this wouldn’t be as lighthearted as the times he came here with his father, but knowing how worried this boy was made him feel sick. “Listen, Kishou… I respect the director and I -” Did he just laugh? But it sounded so bitter. “And… I love… Chika… but I don’t agree with what they’re doing to you.” 

Did he just really say that he loves…? Arima didn’t really comprehend anything after that point. How could someone love one of them? They were horrible people, all of them. Not worthy of anyone’s affection. “What do you mean?” 

“You’re still a child, that’s what I mean.” 

A child…? Then he was the first one who saw him like one. “... I just have this kind of responsibility I can’t … ignore.” 

“I understand that you feel obligated to say that but you don’t have to keep up your act around me.” Maybe his intentions weren’t clear enough. “This is a neutral space. We’re not at the CCG, you’re not talking to a superior. I’m worried about you. I know that you’re skilled, I know you’re smart… but you’re still young. You should worry about other things, not work.” 

The boy opened his mouth but all he could do was stare at the man and cry. 

“... it’s okay… you don’t always have to act strong, okay? It’s okay to cry from time to time. Please don’t think that work is everything in life…” It felt bitter to say it, as someone who chose this path himself, but Arima was still a child… he would have never chosen this kind of life for himself. “Now eat up, it’s getting cold.” 

No, he was wrong. It wasn’t cold, not at all. 

When they left the restaurant the sun was already beginning to set. “I think I should go back now…” It was weird to say goodbye and go back to work tomorrow, Marude would yell at him again, as usual. Now he just knew that there was no bad intention in his words, now that he knew that was really moving him deep on the inside.

“Take care.” The words were choked up. “Get home as quickly as possible and don’t worry… I won’t tell them what happened.” 

“Thank you… Marude-san.” Those words weren’t enough, he wanted to thank him for his kindness, his honesty… the fact that he cared, but all he could say were those 3 words. 

He only waved lightly as he walked away, his chest feeling tight and tears streaming down his face. All that he could think about was, if they were really doing the right thing. He was a teenager himself when he joined the academy, he was a little too brave, a little too bold. Arima was even younger and was already treated like an adult, fighting for life and death if he had to. It just wasn’t right. 

Did things make more sense now? Maybe. Maybe not. His brother was still a riddle to him, his smile was still too staged, his kindness was still faked… but now he understand where the sudden hint of warmness came from. Now he understood why he was even more empty than before. 

Arima looked up into the slowly darkening sky and couldn’t help but wonder, why every place the light touched once, was even darker when it left again.


End file.
